The Gospel: in Panamá

Intro

Writing about my experience with Filter of Hope (FoH) in January has been quite the challenge for many reasons. As my sponsors know, I traveled with FoH to Panama, the country where my father was born. 

I don’t want to repeat from what I’ve commented previously: how FoH’s mission is unique and the mechanisms in which they share the gospel and distribute water filters. If you’re curious about the specifics, you can find those at The Gospel: in Guatemala and The Gospel: in Cuba. I may be biased, by I would highly recommend reading how awesome this mission team is. I wasn’t really sure what to expect going on this trip. I hadn’t taken time to fast or to “get my soul right” before leaving. If you know you’re going to be sharing the gospel for a week, most people pray a time or two. I did, however, ask my sponsors to pray for the preparation of my heart in an email, if that counts. All I knew is that I was going to be working with a team of college students from the University of Flordia (Go Gators!), students from Redeemer Church (Samford University), and that I was going to my home away from home for the first time (outside of just the airport – See The Gospel: Cuba).

As some of you may know, my dad was born off the shores of San Blas, Panamá. He was born on Ogobsucun Island, Kuna Yala.

Kuna Yala is an indigenous tribe that has its own culture and unwritten language. Unfortunately, I cannot speak that or Spanish; I am, however, always surprised by how much high school elementary Spanish comes back when in South America. For those of you reading my blog for the first time and who don’t know my story, you can read it at 13 Years without a Father’s Day or How My Fathers Led Me to the Practice of Medicine.

It was, to say the least, emotionally charging to be in Panama City. I got to meet my family the second night I was there, in a last-minute decision because we got back to the hotel earlier than anticipated. 

The Panamanian Communities

Our team visited three village communities; distributed 86 filters, shared the gospel with 144 Panamanians, and 36 individuals prayed to receive Christ for the first time or recommitted their life to Christ! I can share countless stories of how these families drink their water from a truck that comes once every two weeks (maybe) with harmful chlorine treatment and everything in between that makes families sick. This trend is seen across South America. In my observations, some may not even place significance on their water crisis because it has always been that way, they don’t know another way, or they are not aware of the long-term harm untreated or overtreated water is causing to their physiopsychosocial health.  I would urge anyone, who hasn’t already, to educate themselves on the water crisis by simply googling or reading my published blogs.

There were many tears shared with families, hugs given, and prayers shared with hurting people desperate for community. But the truth is — the people of Panama, living in what some would define as slums, are not extremely destitute families that we cannot relate to. In fact, we can relate to them in more ways one might imagine. I say that because I am guilty of viewing South American families in the same way. They also experience loneliness, loss of loved ones, sickness, house fires, divorce, and doubt that Jesus’ death was real. It’s everything that you and I have experienced.

I admit even going across the country, it’s so easy to think that people are vastly different because they speak a different language, live in another country, and have a different culture. The human experience, however, is full of pain, loss, and struggles; and knowing that, you can relate deeply with anyone in the world. In doing so, you can also talk about Jesus … to anyone in the world. So I refrain from writing this post as if I changed the lives of seemingly untouchable communities. I am thankful to join the movement of God in Panama and join what He has already been doing there for decades. Nothing compares to meeting follower of Jesus across the world and sharing life with a member of your eternal family. These are humans, who are truly only separated by socially constructed borders. If you’ve heard my story, then you already know a personal story of life without Jesus in a Panamanian family (unpublished details, maybe 2040 when I publish a book). 

The College Ministry Team

What surprised me most was the most impactful moment for me: it wasn’t mission work with the Panamanian families, but it was time with the students. Of course, I love meeting families in Panama and having the opportunity to teach them filter installments and hygiene. However, truthfully that wasn’t the most poignant for me. This surprises me probably more than it surprises you, because Panama and its people are home for me. For previous trips, mission work has been the most impactful moment for me. Depending on FoH leadership and dynamic, students may have debriefs every night, either as smaller groups or as a complete group. For this specific trip, on our last night, we had a full group debrief for the first (and last) time.

What I am about to say requires perspective:

For me, meeting total strangers and working with them in an environment unfamiliar to me to share the gospel is so rewarding. You get to make small (or deep) talk with students across the country, learn what their passions are, their stories while riding on the bus to our communities or at meals and best of all experience some of their quirks. When working with other Christians, there is a common understanding and belief that binds us like family from the start (or in my case, welcomed into the group). At the end of a week, you have shared laughs, tears, prayer, and hugs. You feel like at the end of the week you are friends, you have a good grasp on who they are and if you’re like me, still have to look at your notebook to remember their name even though you know remember everything else about them.

However, on our last night, our group leader opened the floor for the students to share anything they wanted about that week that was impactful for them. In other words, it was a vague open mic night. But if you were in that room, you would quickly realize our expectations for what God would do that week didn’t go according to our plan, congruent with His character in my past mission trips. Instead, what was planned to be an hour debrief over our experiences that week ended up being a three-hour outpouring of the student’s hearts for one another and what God was personally doing in their lives. God was able to do that by bringing students to Panama, putting them in uncomfortable situations, forcing God’s power to show in their weakness, and allowing them to be a part of His plan in spreading the good news throughout the whole world so that all nations will hear it.

When you share the gospel with a team of strangers, a concept that you feel like you have a pretty good grasp on (your own salvation), it reminded me (and my team) of how much we need Jesus in our own life; even more than when we first met Him. Students shared deep, in-depth struggles (past and present) in their lives, their need for Jesus, community, and urgency to share and be the gospel in their schools and families. We all know that “everybody has a story,” but until I heard some twenty students share their stories after spending a week with them, I felt I had never truly appreciated that reality. Even when you hear a student have the floor for less than ten minutes, you still only get a glimpse of what they may have been through. This is a reality with even my own sibilings.

"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away..."
-Revelation 21

It wasn’t until I got back home that I realized how far I had been from Jesus during the last two years of my undergraduate. I had made excuses for not being in fellowship with other believers; mostly because I was pursuing medicine and ROTC. Jesus can’t possibly expect me to take time away from my studies (for which He called me) to sit in fellowship, that would mean a B on an exam and not performing for God at my highest level. Sharing my struggles when I got home with a trusted brother of mine showed me the importance of identifying lies that we, or the devil, tell ourselves. I still haven’t identified all those lies, but realizing that you are believing them is a start, following lifelong spiritual warfare. In another, rather distant post, I will share the power of Jesus in overcoming some of those untruths.

Seeing how much a mission trip in Panama changed the lives of the students I worked with, and that being the most impactful moment for me, is another example of how God is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us. Although I went to a “home away from home,” it was a reminder of my true home to which we will one day return. It is a reminder of the strength, vitality, and energy and my heavenly family, and the power of Jesus that bind us together. I struggled to take a gap year before starting medical school, but this trip alone made the wait worth every second, and I’ve learned so much about myself and others in the process. I’ve also learned about how much I don’t know, and have left to learn … about myself and others. I encourage any student reading this to take a gap year (or two) before college or graduate school.

"He is before all things, and in him all things hold together..." - Colossians 1

Notice of Name Change

I guess the best way to end this post is to share some exciting news. Going to Panama probably had something to do with the impetus, although this has been on my mind for the last 18 months. My last name, Stuck, came from the man who my grandmother was married when she and my father immigrated to America. Since then, my grandmother has remarried, but my dad kept his adoptive father’s last name until death. Unfortunately, I have never met Mr. Stuck, nor has he ever reached out to me. I don’t mean that in any passive-aggressive way, it is just a fact. However, for me, being a true Junior is having the name of my father that he had at birth. For this reason, I am changing my name to Ricardo Esteban Fabrega Jr., to bring back my family’s last name, to honor my father, and because Dr. Fabrega (sorry Stuck family) just has a cooler ring to it. 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this blog post, I hope to cross paths with you again soon. Please feel free to reach out to ask me any questions related to my time in Panama. Until then, don’t be a stranger. 

Yours truly,

Ricardo Esteban Fabrega Jr.

“Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation..." - Mark 16

Postscript

Thank you to FoH Ambassador Coordinator Morgan for allowing me to work with two amazing teams, Julianna for your leadership, and Ainsley, Alex, Allison, Branden, Carpenter, Chandler, Danielle, Jacey, Katie, Kayla, Kelly, Lyndsey, Nate, Peyton, Sarah, Shailey, Shannon, and Spencer for welcoming me into your Florida family; Mercy for your display of strength, friendship, and Cru representation. Alexis, Nashma, Lakshmi, Ruman, Emi, and Nidori for translating and sharing the culture with my teams. Finally, thank you to all my sponsors who funded my (probably final) Filter of Hope Ambassadorship and immense support over the last four years.